Hung Up on You
by Iheartsocks
Summary: Rachel is forced towards the girl who ignores her more than anyone else and finds herself having thoughts and feelings she never dreamed of.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Invisible**

No one made me feel like she did. I could bring an audience to its feet with one song; I had Finn following me around with a flick of my hair. When she walked by, if she wasn't insulting me, she wasn't seeing me. I almost longed for her insults, man hands, treasure trail, hobbit. I felt hobbit was more of pet name than an insult; it made me melt inside.

It seemed the Glee kids were getting closer, which meant her too. For me, it was an end to her insults, and instead she just pretended I didn't exist, that I was invisible. I couldn't do the same to her, when she wasn't glaring at me I saw this girl transform into a beauty beyond compare. Her beautiful golden-brown skin and long dark hair, long legs that seemed to go on forever, and her smile which could light up a room. A smile we didn't get to see too very often, especially me.

When I sang in glee she would stare off into space as if there was nothing going on in front of her and she was completely bored. If we had to interact at all she acted like she didn't know me and ignored me as much as possible. Like now, Mr. Shue had just assigned us all duet partners randomly. I hated when he did things randomly, it never worked out for me. I, of course, had to sing a duet with Santana. She didn't bat an eye when he said my name and hers together. She grabbed sheet music out of her backpack along with an orange highlighter and started working on it.

Mr. Shue let out the class 15 minutes early so we could all talk with our duet partners about what song we would be singing. Santana didn't move, she just sat looking at something on her phone ignoring everyone, most especially me. I rolled my eyes and got up and walked over to her. Before I could open my mouth and utter a word she shoved sheet music at me, "You are the highlighted part, practice on your own." She never looked up from her phone.

I took the sheet music, "Hungover" by Kesha. "Santana, this isn't a duet."

She looked up at me for a moment and glared, "It is now Hobbit, if you mess this up, I will mess you up." With that she grabbed her bag and stormed out of the room. Other gleeks were looking at me, but I had nothing to say, her behavior wasn't my fault. Instead I put in my head phones and brought up Kesha on my phone so I could get acquainted with the song. Before I left school for the day I was able to procure Santana's phone number from Brittany. Quinn had tried to get her attention so she wouldn't give it to me but I was able to quickly snatch it before Quinn was successful.


	2. Hate

**Chapter 2: Hate**

I went straight up to my room when I got home and started practicing my half of the duet, but without Santana I wasn't sure everything sounded right. I needed to sing with Santana at least once before we do our assignment in front of the club or it would never sound right. I grabbed my phone, took a deep breath, and sent a text to Santana.

RB: Santana, this is Rachel. Britt gave me your number, we need to practice this together, when do you want to get together?

SL: …I'm busy killing Britt, u can blame urself for her death.

RB: Not funny Santana, we have an assignment we have to do together, I demand we practice together at least once or I will be forced to speak to Mr. Shue.

SL: Calm it down, Hobbs, just funnin ya.

RB: My name is Rachel, would you mind calling me that?

SL: I hate ur name. Get a new 1, I kno, Hobbs! Thas an awesome name.

RB: What is wrong with my name?

SL: Its bossy sounding, like u. Come to think of it, I hate u 2. Stop talking to me.

RB: SANTANA! I will call you; we need to practice together at least once!

…

RB: Fine, I'm on my way to your house right now. I do know where you live.

SL: HOLD IT HOBBS. Tomorrow before school. You got 30 min and then we don't talk ever again.

SL: If u come anywhere near my house, I will kill u. DON'T ever use this number again.

I rolled her eyes and tossed my phone on the bed. I smiled a little to myself, Santana's threats never bothered me because really, when had Santana ever made good on a threat. Plus, there was a new non offensive nickname. And if I was Hobbs to Santana's Calvin, I could get down with that.


	3. Date

**Chapter 3: Date**

I was in the choir room before Santana, that didn't surprise me any, I was actually quite early. I was very nervous and couldn't sit still that morning. How angry was she for the texting last night? Would she acknowledge me at all? Would I screw everything up because of my nerves?

Santana eventually showed up just as she said she would. She handed her music to the pianist and took her position; she hadn't looked at me or said good morning. I walked over to her, "Good morning Santana," I said a little more harshly than I probably needed to.

She didn't look at me or respond, she just gave the signal for the music to start. I was glad we were singing together at least. I had been a little off in tempo and style. She never said a word to me or looked at me but she let me talk and she let me sing it through a few more times before our half hour was up. I took that as a good sign. After our last go through our half hour was up but I still felt like we could use some more work.

She was grabbing her bad when I stopped her, "Santana?" She stopped but she didn't look at me, "Do you think we could practice again after school today? I think we could use just a few more times together, no more than another half hour."

She didn't turn around, but she did answer, "I have a date Hobbs."

"A date? I didn't realize you were dating anyone. Who is your date with?"

She turned and looked at me with a smirk on her face. "Just some girl, but she will probably put out, so I figure I got to treat her to the Santana Lopez experience." I admit it, I blushed at that. She smirked at me again and walked away.

I started packing up my bag, my thoughts on her date night. Probably some Cheerio, a year or two younger than her, just some floozy who wanted to move up the pyramid and who thought Santana could get her there. I wonder what the Santana Lopez experience is exactly. Probably some Breadstix, then out to the abandoned drive in theater, where all the kids went. Some fooling around, Santana would say the things she wanted to hear, and then they would do…that. I wouldn't mind doing that with her.

I stopped dead in my tracks. What was I thinking? I couldn't possibly want…I'm not some…I'm straight! I think. Maybe.

Maybe not.


	4. Pets

**Chapter 4: Pets**

When I got home after school I didn't head up to my room to practice like I usually did. Instead I dropped my bag by the door and flopped down in the middle of the couch. I was too exhausted to do anything else. My mind had been racing around Santana and her date all day at school. I could barely concentrate.

Our dog Maxxie hopped up on the couch and sat her big head in my lap and looked up at me with big eyes. I had never had a pet I loved so much. The other pets my dads would keep would always annoy me in one way or another, but Maxxie and I bonded right away.

I stroked her head and laid my own head back against the couch. I was so sleepy, I yawned widely and closed my eyes, surely a small nap wouldn't hurt. The long silky hair flowing through my fingers wasn't helping me stay awake any. I looked down and Santana was kneeling in front of me with her head in my lap. I was stroking her hair and she was smiling at the gentle touches.

"Who's my good girl?" Santana's head popped up and she looked right at me and smiled. I put a leash on the collar around her neck and led her upstairs to my room. I attached the leash to a hook hanging off my bed post. "Are you my good pet Santana? Hmm?"

Santana, who had been crawling behind me on all fours sat up on her knees and nodded. The large smile never leaving her face. I petted her head slowly and removed her collar. I stood back and she began to undress and crawled into bed and sat on her knees.

"Come undress me my good girl." Santana crawled over and very slowly undressed me, kissing the places she revealed until I was shaking with want.

"Rachel. Rachel! RACHEL!"

I shot up off the couch a look of terror on my face. My two fathers were standing there looking very worried. "I...I..." I was stammering I couldn't speak, what had I just dreamed? It felt so real, it feels so disturbing.

"Rachel, you sounded like you were having a nightmare, come sit down on the couch." Daddy Leroy put his arm around my shoulders and led me back to my place on the couch. Maxxie put her head back in my lap and whined a little. Poppi Hiram sat on a chair facing the couch with a worried look on his face.

"Baby, what was your dream about?" The look of horror on my face must have been convincing of a nightmare, because my daddy squeezed me close to his side.

"I, I don't really remember much, I just remember it was scary. I think I was on stage, and no one was clapping." I was lying, but I was hoping my nerves would keep the believing it was a nightmare.

Both my dads smiled at me and comforted me while I tried to run through that crazy dream. It was almost too much to fathom.


	5. Music

**Chapter 5: Music**

SL: Get to school early. We can practice 1 more time.

RB: I wish you would have said something earlier, I am going to have to skip part of my morning routine to get to you early.

SL: Don't care, get here.

I was just about to do some vocal warm ups while I finished getting ready, but I needed to get ready fast, so those would have to wait until the car. I was sitting around in my towel doing a moisturizing routine that Kurt had put me on to. I decided to skip it along with everything else. I already had taken a shower. I put my wet hair up into a ponytail, pulled out the easiest clothes I could find, grabbed my bag and ran out the door.

I did my vocal warm ups while driving, it wasn't as effective as doing them with perfect posture at home, but it would have to do. I ran to the choir room to open up my lungs for deeper breathing and pushed the door open.

Santana was standing at the piano in her normal Cheerios uniform. She turned when Rachel walked in the room and her jaw dropped. "Jeans? And a t-shirt? Who are you and where is Hobbs?"

I rolled my eyes. "Lets get to the music Santana." She smirked at me and motioned to the pianist. We sang for a full half an hour again and this time I felt that we had come together beautifully.

After the end of the last time I turned to Santana, beaming, hoping to share in my excitement. She turned away and walked out of the room. We would have to sing at glee today and she still couldn't acknowledge me most of the time.


	6. Rain

**A/N: Sorry for the long awaited chapters. I got engaged and so my time around internet has been spent wedding planning. I have been writing during my time away from internet though!**

Chapter 6: Rain

It had started to rain earlier in the day; the storm was only getting louder as Glee drew nearer. It was almost like it was trying to warn me of what was to come. However, glee arrived without incident. I went and sat next to Finn. Quinn, who was on his other side with his arm around her glared at me. I don't know why, he didn't even glance my way. Finn and I could still be friends right? Possibly not. I decided to move one seat down just to be on the safe side. Kurt plopped between Finn and I effectively cutting off Quinn's glare from my sight.

"Girl, I can't wait until you hear the song Blaine and I are singing. We are "Singing in the Rain" literally. It is kismet." Kurt looked at me beaming. Blaine sat down right behind Kurt and grinned at me too. I was starting to feel good. The rain wasn't for me, it was for them, and it was a good sign, not a bad one. Mr. Shue ran down the order in which everyone would sing. Santana and I were last. I suppose that's a good thing. She was off to the side with Brittney and Artie on the opposite side of the room.

Couple after couple sang, Brittany and Finn, Quinn and Mercedes, Artie and Lauren, Kurt and Blaine, Puck and Tina, Mike and Sam. Finally it was our turn. I was nervous only because there was never any indication of when Santana would snap and she so loved snapping in front of a crowd. The song went off without a hitch, it sounded lovely, not as good as I would have wanted but everyone seemed to like it.

Mr. Shue gave his normal accolades to everyone and dismissed us. Santana was up and out the door before I could thank her for singing with me and inviting her to do so again. I chased after her, hoping we could turn this into a friendship.

I caught her in the parking lot in the downpour but I made her stop and talk to me anyway. "Santana, can't you just acknowledge me once in a while? I wanted to say thanks."

"Hobbs, you are bad for my reputation, I don't slushy you and I don't insult you, I would say that's good enough."

Santana went to turn away and I wasn't going to let her get away with this. I was soaked with rain and I was offering her friendship and she just blew me off. I grabbed her arm and spun her back around. "Listen for once. I just wanted to thank you for singing with me and tell you I would like to do it again. You don't have to acknowledge me outside of Glee, I'm just trying to be nice here…"

Santana was in my face before the last trembling word left my mouth. "Don't touch me or talk to me again." Santana turned, jogged over to her car, got in it and left.

I couldn't stop myself, I started sobbing. How could Santana be so mean when all I wanted was to be her friend? Ok, true, I wanted more than that but she didn't know that! All she knew was that I was offering her my friendship. I was crying too hard to drive, so I decided to walk the two miles to my house. I obviously needed to think this through, there was a way to get to Santana, I just knew it!


	7. Young

Chapter 7: Young

As soon as I got in the door I went up to my room and into my bathroom. I needed a warm shower and dry clothes. I hadn't gotten anywhere in my thought process on how to get through to Santana. It all seemed to hopeless. As I removed all of my sopping wet clothes I caught sight of myself in my mirror. I removed the rest of the clothes and took a good hard long look at what I was doing to myself. My hair was a sopping wet mess hanging down around my shoulders. My skin had a slight bluish hue and was goose bumped from the cold. My eyes were red rimmed from crying and my nose was read and running. In short, I looked like a mess.

I was 17 years old, I had just started my senior year of high school and I was chasing after some girl who hated me. I had wasted so much of my high school career chasing after Lima Losers, Finn, Jesse, Puck, and now Santana. She wasn't worth my time. I was going to be a star on Broadway; I would have men and women throwing themselves at me.

Sure, I was just starting to realize my bisexuality, but that didn't mean I had to chase after girls who didn't like me. I was also discovering some rather enticing though altogether shocking fantasies. That didn't mean I needed someone to try them out on. I am young, I am just starting out. I don't need anyone else to validate myself. I am Rachel Barbra Berry. I do not chase after girls. I do not play games. I am more mature than that.

I gave myself one last stern look in the mirror before hopping in the shower to warm up. After the shower I put my hair up, donned my warmest sweats and went downstairs to find my dads so I could get a ride back to school to get my car.

I told my dads I simply walked home in a fit of rage after the duet didn't go well because Santana couldn't be bothered to practice and they seemed to understand that the diva inside of me was sometimes a little too emotional. Daddy Leroy drove me back to school to get my car and gave me a small lecture about walking in the cold rain.

Thinking about it, I could have contracted something that might hurt my voice, my whole career. How could I have let some petty crush with some Lima Loser cloud my judgment? I vowed to myself it would never happen again. I was young, and I would probably bounce back from anything, but I wasn't immune to things and I needed to remember what was most important in my life.

**A/N: Sorry for the long awaited chapters. I got engaged and so my time around internet has been spent wedding planning. I have been writing during my time away from internet though!**

Chapter 6: Rain

It had started to rain earlier in the day; the storm was only getting louder as Glee drew nearer. It was almost like it was trying to warn me of what was to come. However, glee arrived without incident. I went and sat next to Finn. Quinn, who was on his other side with his arm around her glared at me. I don't know why, he didn't even glance my way. Finn and I could still be friends right? Possibly not. I decided to move one seat down just to be on the safe side. Kurt plopped between Finn and I effectively cutting off Quinn's glare from my sight.

"Girl, I can't wait until you hear the song Blaine and I are singing. We are "Singing in the Rain" literally. It is kismet." Kurt looked at me beaming. Blaine sat down right behind Kurt and grinned at me too. I was starting to feel good. The rain wasn't for me, it was for them, and it was a good sign, not a bad one. Mr. Shue ran down the order in which everyone would sing. Santana and I were last. I suppose that's a good thing. She was off to the side with Brittney and Artie on the opposite side of the room.

Couple after couple sang, Brittany and Finn, Quinn and Mercedes, Artie and Lauren, Kurt and Blaine, Puck and Tina, Mike and Sam. Finally it was our turn. I was nervous only because there was never any indication of when Santana would snap and she so loved snapping in front of a crowd. The song went off without a hitch, it sounded lovely, not as good as I would have wanted but everyone seemed to like it.

Mr. Shue gave his normal accolades to everyone and dismissed us. Santana was up and out the door before I could thank her for singing with me and inviting her to do so again. I chased after her, hoping we could turn this into a friendship.

I caught her in the parking lot in the downpour but I made her stop and talk to me anyway. "Santana, can't you just acknowledge me once in a while? I wanted to say thanks."

"Hobbs, you are bad for my reputation, I don't slushy you and I don't insult you, I would say that's good enough."

Santana went to turn away and I wasn't going to let her get away with this. I was soaked with rain and I was offering her friendship and she just blew me off. I grabbed her arm and spun her back around. "Listen for once. I just wanted to thank you for singing with me and tell you I would like to do it again. You don't have to acknowledge me outside of Glee, I'm just trying to be nice here…"

Santana was in my face before the last trembling word left my mouth. "Don't touch me or talk to me again." Santana turned, jogged over to her car, got in it and left.

I couldn't stop myself, I started sobbing. How could Santana be so mean when all I wanted was to be her friend? Ok, true, I wanted more than that but she didn't know that! All she knew was that I was offering her my friendship. I was crying too hard to drive, so I decided to walk the two miles to my house. I obviously needed to think this through, there was a way to get to Santana, I just knew it!


	8. Wish

Chapter 8: Wish

I was confident and cool when I went back to school the next day. I wouldn't be bothered with those who wouldn't be bothered with me. I wouldn't be nice to those who wouldn't be nice to me. I wouldn't give my all to people who wouldn't even care if I wasn't here anymore. It was time to figure out who my friends were. As an actress I would need a close circle of those I could trust, and I would need to know who amongst my many friends those few people were. There was no better time to start practicing that art than now.

I started running down the list; Finn was a friend, but not to be trusted. Mike, Artie and Sam were acquaintances. Puck was in the no trust category for now, but that could change. Blaine was an acquaintance but I knew I could trust him. Kurt was my best friend and I could trust him with anything.

Santana and Quinn were arms length acquaintances. They were to be treated kindly but kept far away from ones personal life. Brittany and Lauren were acquaintances. Tina was an acquaintance who could be a trusted friend and Mercedes was a trusted friend.

I opened my locker and smiled at the picture of my dads and me. I was going to be ok. I was going to be smart about this.

"I wish you would wear better clothes Hobbs, it would make it easier to talk to you." I didn't acknowledge her. Seriously? How could she think that was appropriate? I put the items I didn't need into my locker and took the items I did need. Right as I was about to close my locker, Santana slammed it shut for me. "Didya hear me? I need to take you shopping. I shouldn't have to look at you like this."

I took a deep breath trying to remind my beating heart that she was cruel and mean to me and I was not going to take it any longer. "Santana, I appreciate that you don't like my attire most days, but I do, so I will continue to wear it."

I made to walk away but she blocked me. "Come on Hobbs. I wish you could just see how horrid you look."

"And I wish you would understand that the world doesn't revolve around you, Santana." I pushed past her and walked quickly into my next class. My heart was racing but I was resolved to stand up for myself no matter what my hormones told me to do.

Santana was in my third period class but I usually sat in front and she usually sat in back with Brittany, so I wasn't worried about her confronting me. I shouldn't have been so confident. The moment I walked in the room Brittany grabbed me and drug me back to their table. She plopped me down next to Santana, who had an unreadable look on her face, and sat at the next table over.

I was about to ask her if she would mind if I sat in front when she turned towards me, bouncing in her seat, looking very excited. "You are like, never going to believe what happened. I had an eyelash fall out on my cheek and Santana said if I blew on it and made a wish it would come true. I wished that you would wear something different and Santana said you two were going shopping tonight to buy you something new." Brittany didn't mean anything by it. She was just very honest, and she honestly didn't like my clothing. I tried my best to remain calm with her.

"Brittany, I appreciate that you wasted a wish on my clothing, but I like what I wear and I am not going shopping with Santana. However, I would like to go back to my seat." I tried to be as gentle as possible but Brittany's face fell anyway. She looked like I had just taken away all of her wishes ever. Santana was cruel. "How about I just wear something different tomorrow and not go shopping?"

This didn't seem to be the right answer either. She got a look of hard concentration on her face. "How about I come with the two of you tonight and help you pick out something and then you wear it tomorrow?" She was looking at me as if I was in charge of making her wish come true. Who could deny that face?

"Ok, one outfit, you pick it out Brittany, not Santana. And then I go back to wearing my normal clothing." Brittany clapped her hands, cheered, and then hugged me. The teacher, who had been ignoring our conversation up until that point, threw us a dirty look to quiet down. Santana laughed silently beside me, happy to have gotten her way I'm sure.


	9. Rumor

Chapter 9: Rumor

Brittany and Santana picked me up later that night and we drove to the mall. Brittany insisted we stop for dinner before shopping. I pieced together a vegan meal from the different offerings at the food court and we all sat at a table together. Santana was staring off into space and Brittany was chattering on about squirrels or something. I tried to pay attention but sometimes I lost track of her thought process and got lost.

She suddenly stopped and stared me square in the face, "I hear a rumor that you've slept with every guy in Glee, including Kurt and Blaine." Santana, eyes wide turned towards me and stared; her eyes boring into mine as if she was demanding an answer to the unasked question, was the rumor true?

I turned back to Brittany, trying to shake Santana's intent gaze, "Brittany, I am still a virgin; I most definitely have not been sleeping with any boys, including the glee boys. Where did you hear that?"

"It was on Jacob's blog…" Before she could say another word I pulled out my phone and started searching his blog for information regarding me. He often posted lies about me but nothing this big or this bad. I looked up to ask Brittany when she had seen this and I saw Santana also flipping through something on her phone. She suddenly stood up from the table, put the phone to her ear and walked away.

Brittany was happily munching on her food and hadn't noticed the change at the table or Santana's disappearance. Or so I thought. "You and Santana should date; you would be good for each other."

I almost dropped my phone. "Brittany, I appreciate what you are saying, but Santana and I are not compatible. I think it is for the best if you don't bring that up again."

Brittany got a funny smile on her face and laughed. "Ok, but I know what I am talking about. You will see."

Santana came back to the table as we were finishing up. She plopped down next to Brittany and looked at me. "Turns out Finnocence thought that it would be a good idea to tell Jacob that you were a slut because you stopped trying to get his attention and returning his advances. I have taken care of the blog; I will take care of the rumors, and as for Finnept, that will be dealt with later." Santana had a very unhappy look on her face.

Brittany grinned and wrapped her arms around Santana, "That was super sweet of you San. Now that you have defended Rachie's honor we should go shopping!"

I was dropped at home with an outfit Brittany had picked out for me. It was actually really cute and I had felt good in it. Santana had stood back and not said much. She would agree with everything Brittany said but stayed out of it as much as possible. I was happy for that. I didn't need any more of her crap. We ended the day with a pair of skinny jeans, a black shirt with a collar so large that it fell off one shoulder and a pink tank top underneath.


	10. Party

Chapter 10: Party

The next morning Brittany had interrupted my morning routine to do my hair and makeup. She was so bubbly and excited that I decided one Friday wouldn't hurt to go full glam. She curled my hair into large waves, and slathered my face with makeup. The smoky eyes were not something I would have picked but they worked rather well.

While she was getting me ready she chattered on about a party at her house tonight. I had almost lost track of what she was saying when I heard her ask, "You are coming to the party right? My parents will be there so your dads can call them and check it out if they want."

I was about to protest but Poppi Hiram had been walking by when she asked and he stepped in. "Rachel, that's a wonderful idea! As long as Brittany's parents are going to be there I have no problem with you going and you don't go to parties much. You should go!"

I looked back at him helpless, hoping he would help me out of this situation but he just smiled. The twinkle in his mischievous eyes was enough to tell me he wasn't the least bit interested in helping me at all. "Of course I will go Brittany. Just tell me where and when and I will be there." Poppi clapped his hands and said he would clear it with Daddy just be on the safe side. Before we left for school they confirmed that I was clear to go to the party. Yay me.

There were a lot of stares when I got to school that day. There were usually stares when I went in something different than the norm but today those stares were lingering. The large grin on Brittany's face next to me I'm sure let people know who was responsible for this look. "You are so hot today Rachie, Santana is going to flip when she sees you."

I smiled at Brittany, poor naïve girl that she was. "Brittany, I understand that you think Santana and I would make a good couple, but we are worlds apart. She doesn't like me at all and that's fine, because even if she did we are so different it couldn't ever work. I love that you are trying to help your friends, but this isn't right for either of us."

Once again, Brittany just smiled at me. I had just opened my locker and was about to ask Brittany more about the party when Santana showed up. She took one look at me, grabbed Brittany's wrist and took off again. I shrugged my shoulders and headed to my first class. Throughout the day I started hearing rumors about Quinn and Finn. Some ranged from a yelling match, to a physical fight that Finn lost. It wasn't until third period when I heard the truth. Brittany pulled me back to the back again, but this time Santana was across the aisle and I was next to Brittany.

She started whispering in my ear "Santana told Quinn what Finn did and Quinn freaked out on him and punched him in the face. He tried to punch her back and Puck punched him and now Quinn and Finn are broken up and Santana spread it around the school that you were not a slut and anyone who said otherwise would answer to her."

"Brittany! I don't like violence! Quinn should never have punched Finn."

Brittany looked at me like I was stupid and rolled her eyes, "Quinn didn't do it for you silly, she did it because Finn is a total jerk and still wanted you while dating her. Plus, like, everyone wants to hit him all the time anyway. You really should just drop him."

I blushed; Brittany was more perceptive than I thought. "Brittany, I know he is no good for me. I have no interest in being with him anymore."

"You do a little, but don't worry, I won't let you." Brittany smiled at me and turned back to the front of the classroom. When the class let out she grabbed my arm before I could leave and smiled. "See you at glee Rachie." Then Santana and Brittany were gone.

I didn't see Finn for the rest of the day and Jacob seemed very scared of me, running every time he caught sight of me. More people were talking to me today, mostly little things, but it was noticeable. Kurt and Mercedes caught up with me at lunch and I thought Kurt was going to have a heart attack.

"I heard Brittany gave you a makeover but I didn't know this was the result, you look amazing!" Kurt gushed.

"Yeah, better than the one I got my sophomore year that's for sure." Mercedes let out a laugh at my joke at Kurt's expense but he took it like a champ.

We sat munching on lunch while Kurt and Mercedes talked about the finer points of my makeover and how I should maintain this look. I was only half paying attention to what they were saying. I wasn't trying to be rude but I had the party on my mind. "Are you two going to Brittany's party tonight?"

"Heck yes, are you going?" Mercedes asked.

"I did say I would go. I was only just asked this morning though. I wish I had been told ahead of time." I frowned at them, why had they been invited and not me? Brittany seemed to actually like me. I was slowly moving her in the friend category, just not the close trusted friend category.

"We were asked this morning too, I think most kids just found out about it today, but who can resist a party?" Kurt said. He went on to talk about calling his dad to tell him about Finn and about the party. Kurt was given permission to go; however, Finn was grounded. That made me feel better, I didn't want him there after what he had said about me.

We decided that Blaine and Kurt would of course be each other's dates and Mercedes and I would go together as well. Mercedes offered to pick us all up and take us all to the party. I was getting more and more excited about this party as the day went on.


	11. Cheating

Chapter 11: Cheating

I heard the honk of Kurt's horn at precisely 7 pm. I ran down from my bedroom, kissed both my dads on their cheeks and flew out the door. I was nervous but excited. I was the last to get picked up. Kurt was driving and Blaine was beside him. Mercedes was in the backseat smiling at me when I got in.

I hadn't changed since earlier in the day, I had only touched up on the makeup a little. All of the car's occupants seemed happy that I had chosen to continue with this new look for the whole day.

When we arrived at Brittany's it was obvious that there were a lot of people there from all the cars, but it was rather quiet for a party. We went to the door and Brittany's parents let us in and led us to the basement which was full of kids. The four of us went and got drinks and found places throughout the room to sit and talk with friends. I had thought the party would be louder than this but it was all very subdued.

About 8:30 Brittany's parents, who had stayed upstairs the entire party came down. Mr. Pierce whistled to get all of our attention, "Kids, we understand that you all like to have parties, and we like to provide you a safe space to do so. Mrs. Pierce and I will be leaving until 2:00 am. Brittany knows where the alcohol is if you want it. A few rules before we leave. You do not leave this house if you have had anything to drink. Do not get loud, if the cops are called these parties end. If your parents call we will come back and get you to talk to them so don't be so drunk you can't talk to them. If you do leave, you go straight home and you have a parent call to confirm you got there safe. Anyone who wants to may stay the night, we will get you breakfast and get you home tomorrow. Our cell numbers are posted by every phone, call us if any of you need anything."

They came down, said their goodbyes to Brittany and left. I was shocked honestly. I didn't expect them to leave, I thought the whole party would be a calm affair; I was starting to really like it. I had a feeling that was about to end. I contemplated leaving, but really I needed this experience, this may be the only time I was going to be able to.

The drinking started slowly. The glee kids were especially slow at getting a good buzz going, except Santana, Brittany, and Quinn of course. Santana and Brittany pulled Mercedes and I into a game of poker over in the corner. At first there was no betting, just winners and losers, but that became boring to Santana. She got an evil look on her face and looked at me, "How about strip poker Hobbs?"

I already knew she was cheating; she wasn't very sly about it when she was drunk. I really didn't need to play strip poker with a cheater, I would end up naked. "Santana, there is a room full of people, I am not stripping."

Mercedes broke in before Santana could say anything else, "Ohhell no! I am not stripping, I don't care, I'm gonna go talk to Kurt." She got up quickly and stormed off, I made to follow her but Santana grabbed my wrist and pulled me back down.

"Come on Hobbs, I won't cheat anymore, I promise. I wanna play; it's better with more than two people." She stuck her lip out at me and I wanted to roll my eyes, but that wouldn't have been polite.

"Sanatana, I am not playing strip poker, that is my final word on the situation. I am going to find Mercedes." I again went to follow Mercedes when Santana pulled me back down.

"Fine! No stripping then, but we gotta play for something." Santana contemplated what we could bet on when Quinn dropped down next to us.

"Shots! We aren't getting drunk enough over here. We can play poker and losers drink." Others heard Quinn's announcement and joined us for shot poker. We had a large crowd going, to the point where the game was just silly. Santana was still cheating, though she drank when she won anyway.

The poker game went on for hours. No one really noticed because we weren't paying much attention to it, we were more interested in talking with each other. Everyone took a shot after every hand no matter who had won or not won. The hands got slower and slower as the drunkenness and talking caused by the drunkenness increased.

2:00 a.m. was creeping ever closer when Brittany's parents would be home and no one would be allowed to leave. Those that were sober offered rides to the drunken ones who wanted to leave. Blaine, who had stayed sober was leaving with Kurt, asked Mercedes and I if we wanted to go. Mercedes jumped up, swayed a little, and confirmed she wanted to leave, she wasn't sleeping on a floor.

I was about to do the same when Quinn grabbed me, pressing herself into my back, "She is staying with us. Aren't you Hobbs?"

Were those her boobs in my back? It felt nice; I liked her boobs in my back. I shook my head slowly; my drunken haze was having an effect on my ability to form a coherent thought. Except those boobs. I like boobs. I like girls, maybe more than boys. Girls have boobs.

This was about the only thing going through my mind at the moment when Blaine, Kurt, and Mercedes walked up the stairs to leave. The only people left were Brittany, Quinn, and Santana. As soon as this registered I felt a little bit of alarm, especially knowing I wasn't thinking straight (boobs).

Brittany saddled up to the other side of me and Santana smirked at me from across the table. Quinn whispered in my ear "Come on Rachie, don't you want to play a little poker with us? Strip poker?"

I looked at Brittany first who was giving me an innocent smile, Santana, who was giving me an evil smirk, and Quinn who I couldn't even read at this moment. I was too drunk to deny her request. "Sure, but Santana can't cheat anymore."

Quinn smiled at me and moved back to her spot, "She won't, she promises."


	12. Oops

Chapter 12: Oops

We had forgotten one little detail when we began strip poker, Brittany's parents were coming home, and soon. Brittany, who had won all of the hands up until this point was fully dressed. Quinn and I had had socks on and so we had only had to remove our shirts after our socks came off. Santana was down to bra and underwear.

Brittany's parents walked in during our drunken giggling and Brittany's dad turned right back around and went upstairs. Brittany looked at her mom and blushed. "Oops."

"Oops is right ladies." Brittany's mother scolded us for playing strip poker, thanked us for waiting for the boys to leave, and told us to get our clothes on and go to bed.

Brittany, who was showing signs of tiring, grabbed Quinn's hand and shirt and headed for the door while Quinn scrambled to get her shirt on. "We are going to sleep in my room. Lord Tubbington doesn't like Santana after that stunt she pulled, and doesn't know you Rachie, so you have to stay on the futon down here."

I rolled my eyes and pulled my shirt back on. Santana opened a closet in the basement after the girls left and pulled out some pillows and blankets. I grabbed one pillow and blanket and made my way over to the recliner to sleep.

"Aren't you going to sleep on the futon Hobbs? It'll be more comfortable." It almost looked like she was leering at me while she talked in the most super sweet voice she could muster.

"You take it Santana, I will be fine on the chair." I fluffed my pillow and found the comfiest spot in the recliner. She huffed and sat down on the futon and just stared at me. "Aren't you going to get some sleep Santana?"

"Hobbs, you are killing my buzz, I need to get my cuddle on, come over here."

"I don't think that is appropriate. I think it would be best if we stayed separate."

"It's cause I'm gay, huh?" Santana was starting to turn into a sad drunk. This wasn't the first time I had seen her as a sad drunk and I didn't want to deal with it. My buzz was trying to put me to sleep.

"You know that's not true, you are just trying to guilt me to get your own way. Its not going to work Santana. Go to sleep!" I pulled the blanket over my head and closed my eyes, hoping I would fall asleep quickly. I didn't expect the waive of dizziness that came over me as soon as I closed my eyes.

"Oops." I pulled the blanket back down so I could get some fresh air. I was feeling decidedly not so tired anymore. Santana was busy laying the back of the futon down making it bigger than a couch for sleeping on. She looked up at me and seemed to know what was happening.

She came over and quickly picked me up and put me on the futon. I wanted to fight but the feeling the room was spinning wasn't stopping, and being picked up only made it worse. She grabbed my foot and put it on the ground. "Don't take your foot off the ground, pick a spot on the ceiling and force yourself to see it not turn. Imma get a bucket."

She was back quickly with a bucket and laid down beside me. She didn't touch me and fell asleep quickly. I don't know how quickly I fell asleep, but the next thing I knew I was awake and it was pitch black.


	13. Kiss

Chapter 13: Kiss

I was no longer laying on my back, but was instead laying on someone's shoulder. Their arm was around my back and their hand was rubbing my back. I realized quickly it was Santana. I tried to pull away but she pulled me closer.

"Santana, let go."

"Mmmm, no."

I poked her in the side. "Santana, let me go."

"No entiendo, duérmete amor."

Did she just say amor? Oh heck no! Now I'm amor? I forcibly pulled myself away from her. She tried to stop me but she was too far asleep to do much about it. I stomped over to the recliner and got back into it. It wasn't as comfortable as sleeping with Santana but that didn't matter. I wasn't going to let her play hot and cold with me.

Little did I know that wouldn't be the end of her hot and cold. After waking up the two of us didn't speak all through breakfast, though we managed not to catch anyone's attention. We both were taken home and exchanged no words all weekend.

Back at school seemed to be the same. I didn't see her in the morning, and I sat in my normal seat without distraction during the class that we share. However, there was the odd eye contact when were within viewing distance in the hall. The small arm brushes that she didn't even seem to be aware of. Sitting next to me in glee and pretending I wasn't there.

This went on for days. Every once in a while, when she would catch me alone she would say hello in a breathy voice in my ear. I will admit it gave me goosebumps, but is also annoyed me that only when we were alone would she do this.

She seemed to be throwing hints my way that she wanted something more, but then other times she seemed to not know who I was at all.

After a week of this treatment the texts started. The treatment at school stayed the same. There was no perceptible difference, but the texts were certainly something different. They came all through out the day at random moments. From the time I got up in the morning, to late in the night. They all said something different but they had a main theme.

I didn't respond to any of them. I needed better for myself. I needed someone who would treat me right. Not someone who was going to play games with me and make me chase them.

SL: Why can't I stop thinking bout u?

SL: HOBBS! Get out of my head.

SL: Ur skin is so soft. I bet ur lips r 2.

SL: Ur making me crazy, stop it!

SL: Can I kiss u?

SL: What will it take for u to answer me?

SL: I miss u Hobbs, I wish you would answer me. Maybe come over tonight.

SL: I'm lonely Hobbs, I need u.

This was just the first day. This went on for three days before the incident. Each day the texts got worse and worse. More and more graphic. One could say that this was turning into one person sexting.

Then Thursday happened. I hadn't gotten a text from Santana all morning. I figured after the extreme heat from the texts last night not getting her anywhere she had decided to give up.

I got into the choir room early before anyone else was at the school per usual. What wasn't usual was that Brad wasn't there but Santana was. I rolled my eyes. I really didn't want to deal with her right now.

I dropped my bag and prepared to give her a piece of my mind when she walked over to me quickly, wrapped her arms around me and kissed me.


	14. Diary

Chapter 14: Diary

Dear Diary,

OK so I admit it, I haven't picked you up in a few years, and maybe you were covered in dust, but I need to talk to someone and I literally have no one I can trust with this information.

I slapped Santana. Not lightly either. Hard, right across the face. This was very early this morning and my hand still stings. She had a big rep palm print on her cheek all day, though from what I have heard she never ratted me out.

I abhor violence. I can't believe I did that to her. I can't believe I let myself do it. I fell like the worst person in the world.

She grabbed me, she kissed me, I liked it. It was hot and erotic and I felt it all through my body. There was heat and goosebumps and I felt like I was going to collapse. Then she moaned my name. Not even that stupid nickname she gave me. No my actual name.

I wanted to cry. She was kissing me, she was sitting here wanting me. Where no one could see, where no one could hear. That was the only time she wanted me. I backed away from her, I knew I was crying. She tried to grab for me again and I slapped her.

She didn't move for a minute and I thought she would hit me back. The look of anger on her face scared me so much. She just looked at me for a minute. I tried to gather the courage to apologize but I just couldn't before she walked out of the room.

What do I do?

I don't know why I am trying to find answers in a diary, I need to call Kurt. Hopefully he is free tomorrow night, I need a girls night.


End file.
